Laura-isms II

~ Summer 2013 ~

• "That's a dead end! If we go down there we might die!" said Laura when we were out for a family bike ride.
  
• Laura had been complaining her foot was hurting her on and off throughout the day. At bedtime she said it was still hurting. I asked her where it was hurting; she said the whole thing. I asked her, "What kind of hurting is it?" She said, "A tiger."
  
• Laura's current favourite book is A Fish Out of Water. She likes to have it read to her almost daily, and she likes to sit and flip through the pages, retelling as many details as she can remember. Today she was flipping through it and on the page where the boy feeds the fish all the food in the box, she muses, "Mom... did you guys do that to Willow?"
  
• Laura crawled into bed with us one morning and was examining some pajama pants in Josh's drawer of his bedside table. She says, "Hey - there's some letters on your pants! It says 'pants'!" (She was referring to the label, which said 'Old Navy'.)
  
• Playing outside, Laura is investigating the sap on the pine tree. Josh takes her in to wash her hands. She comes back out and says, "Mommy, I'm not going to get that peanut butter on my hands anymore."

 ~ Spring 2013 ~

• While coming back from the store (where we bought chocolate), Laura says, "I want some chocolate!" I reply, "Well, we are going home to make dinner, so maybe you can have one after that."
  "I'm going to spill my dinner out of my bowl all over the floor - then I can have a chocolate. Does that sound like a good deal?"
  
• While talking about the giant from Jack and the Beanstalk, Laura says, "Fee Fi Fo Fum! I smell the bum of a boy!"
  
• Laura, would you like a cheese bun?" "Yes! I love cheese bums!"
  
• Laura started gymnastics, and her coach was a man who was bald. When we were at Easter dinner, we were telling everyone about Laura's new lessons, and she said, "Yeah, and my teacher has a ball on him head!"
  
• Daddy was walking Laura on the ceiling and told her she was kinda like Spiderman. When he put her down, she farted and said, "Oops, Spiderman pooped a little."
  
• While at the grocery store, Laura was banished to the car for repeatedly bugging her sister. A lady we knew at the store gave Laura an apple on the way out, so she sat in the car with Josh and ate her apple. When I came out with the groceries, Josh opened Laura's door to put them in the car, and she dropped (/ threw?) her half-eaten apple on the ground. She then proceeded to whine incessantly about how she wanted her apple back. Josh said, "Well then, you shouldn't have thrown it out the door!" To which she replied, "Well then, you shouldn't have opened the door!"
  
• "I'm a bird! COCK COCK COCK!"

~ Winter 2013 ~

• After tripping over Chester and crashing to the floor, Laura shed some tears. Shortly after, she decided she wanted another bite of her breakfast and said, drying her eyes, "I don't want these drips anymore."
  
• After Laura uses the toilet, I often remark, "P. U.!" (as in it stinks). Today I came in when she was done, and she replied, "P. Me!"
  
• While stalling at bedtime, Laura asks Daddy, "What's that?" pointing to some mundane thing in her room that she obviously knew what it was. Daddy obliges and answers her anyway. Laura again asks, "What's that?" about something else she obviously knows. Daddy replies. Laura asks, "What's... everything in the house?" 
  
• When we were driving past the pool one day, Laura said, "Remember when we went swimming there with Daddy and Rachel and you? I was wearing a baby suit, and you were wearing a mommy suit, and Daddy had a daddy suit!"
  
• I want to dress up like a fire human!
  
• Me: Wow, Laura, that's a big poop!
  Laura: It's like a crocodile!
  
• Laura, on the way to the in-laws for Christmas (a 5-hour drive): "I'm full of driving"
  (to be fair, we had been in the car about 4.5 hours by that point)