Christmas is Coming!

     This weekend was full of fun-filled family/ Christmas activities. As usual, we took Laura to her swimming lessons Saturday morning, and she did better than she usually does when I am in the pool, which was nice.

Afterwards, we went and picked up her Christmas ornament she painted last week... it's very 'abstract', we'll say, but turned out pretty well, I think, considering it was painted by a one-year-old. :)

     After swimming we went to the bank for some financial advice, for which Laura was reasonably well-behaved, other than trying to make off with the paper from the lady's printer. Then we came home and had a quick bite and some naps. After I woke up, I made Laura a hat to go with her winter coat, and then we trekked off to the Santa Claus parade in town. I was only able to stay for about the first 20 minutes because I had to go to work, and I wasn't sure if Laura would be into it or not, but when Josh tried to bring her into the restaurant half way through the parade she demanded to be taken back out. So I guess she liked it. She was a little apprehensive of the loudness that was the emergency service vehicles, but felt compelled to wave to them nonetheless (below). Based on the amount of times she mentioned "Neigh!! Neigh!! Boon! Boons!", I'd say it is safe to say her favourite parts were the horses from the riding club, and the balloon store's float.

     Josh came into the restaurant for dinner after the parade (along with EVERYONE else who was watching it), and though the service was slow, Laura was very patient and did really well on her date out with Daddy. :)
     This morning we got a start on Christmas shopping and went for groceries and I was actually able to enjoy our family trip to the grocery store again without feeling the need to vomit. After, we went and picked out some Christmas movies to rent for the week, and came home for lunch. After naptime Josh and I discussed the possibility of going to see the new Muppet movie with Laura. She is only one and a half, but has a reasonably long attention span for movies she is interested in, and she is definitely interested in the Muppets, so we thought we would give it a go. Plus it was good way to put off vacuuming. She did about as well as I expected her to; she sat through about half the show contentedly eating Skittles, and then decided that traversing the giant set of stairs would be more entertaining for the second half of the movie. It was fine - there weren't that many people there, and she wasn't being loud, and most of the other patrons had kids with them. When the movie was over (it was quite cute, by the way, if you're wondering), we came home and Skyped Grandma and Grandpa so Laura could tell them about her weekend. She told them all about the "[Muppet] Show! Show!" and the "Neighs! Nine Neighs!" and the "Boons!!" and then proceeded to run around the living room on her Skittle high.
     All in all a good weekend. <3

Laura These Days

     I feel like Laura deserves a post all to herself just for an update on what she has been up to:

     She has been ever increasing her vocabulary, and although she seems to possibly be slightly behind her same-age peers, she still manages to impress us and make us laugh on a daily basis. She repeats words back that we say (or tries to, at least), and is always looking to use them in context. The other night (after our ultrasound) we were out for dinner, and I guess she was quite hungry. We had bread on the table, but I didn't want her to fill up on that, so we only gave her one piece. Next thing I know, she is reaching out for it saying, "Peesh! Peesh!!" (that is toddlerese for 'please'). It was soo cute, I couldn't stand it. She had never used 'please' in context before without being prompted! Of course I had to give in. <3 We have been working on using it in context this week, but mostly we still get "I WA DAT" ('I want that').
She also understands the idea of one and more than one, which she refers to as 'TWO!', regardless of how many there actually are. Either she is very excited about the concept of two, or she likes to make bad mathematician factorial jokes on a daily basis.

     The big girl bed... still not going so well. She sleeps on the floor behind her door every night. Which is fine, I guess. :S Her bed is now used for stuffed animal storage and gymnastics during the day. And, if it's possible, she sleeps even more lightly now than she did before, so any tiny creak in the floor wakes her up. It has made for some long nights. Thankfully if/ when she wakes up at night now, I can go in and tell her that, "Mommy is tired, and it is the middle of the night, so you need to go to sleep right now, because Mommy is going back to bed." She also gets a lot of, "Mommy is going for a nap now. You can have a nap, too, or stay in your room and play quietly." Both of which seem to work reasonably well. :) We are planning on moving her to her new room after Christmas. It will probably be a long and painful transition if the transition to her 'big girl bed' has been any indication, so we want to give her lots of time.

     Since I have been working, Laura has started eating so much better! She has hardly been on any purees, and has even started eating meat with a fork. She has also been eating much MORE food, and growing like a weed, accordingly. It's actually a huge relief to see her take real interest in making sure she gets enough. She is still nursing about 3-ish times a day (when she wakes up, before nap, and after nap), give or take depending on the day. I am starting to get the feeling that people are beginning to frown upon this, but it is still working for her and for me, so we will continue. And not that I need to defend myself, but even the WHO recommends breastfeeding until age two.

     Laura is enrolled in swimming lessons again for the semester, and as long as Mom isn't in the pool, she continues to enjoy them. If I am there, she whines and clings to me and doesn't participate in any of the activites even though she can do all the required skills. We did have to buy her a wetsuit, though, so she would be warm enough, and she still shivers by the end of the lesson. This kid needs some body fat!
She is also heavily into animal books and has developed a strong fascination with the moon. She likes to watch 'Mouch!' (Mickey Mouse), Pooh, and 'Memmo' (Elmo/ Sesame Street) and refers to The Count as 'Nine' because of this song on one of her DVDs. Very cute.

     We are starting to think about potty training, but so far Laura hasn't shown a whole lot of interest. Sometimes we can convince her to do a #2 on the toilet if we catch her quickly enough in the beginning stages, but we've definitely got a long way to go still. I am pretty sure she could do it, but she has to be motivated to want to, and so far she doesn't seem to be. I am in no rush, as we don't have to buy diapers, and I am concerned about it interfering with our trip in February. Potty training accidents are not something I particularly want to deal with while on vacation, so I might just wait until we get back. Having said that, she will be getting some big girl undies for Christmas. :)

     Also, I taught her to do this tonight:

Charming, I know :)

Baby #2!!

    So, I have mentioned already that I am pregnant again, but today it is official - we have pictures to prove it! :)

 

     I am supposed to be 10.5 weeks today, and baby was measuring right on schedule, if not a little big already (4cm crown to rump)! The technician told us that the heart rate was 169bpm, to which I immediately replied, "Oh! It must be a girl!" Josh was not impressed. (I think the old wives tale is that a heart rate of over 140 is a girl). Right now I would like to keep the sex a surprise since we found out with Laura, and I would like to try it the other way, plus I don't really care as much this time. We have a lot less planning to do, so it isn't as important to me. Josh would like to know, though, so we haven't completely decided one way or the other.
     Baby seemed perfectly healthy - as far as you can tell when (s)he is only 4cm long. I was surprised at how human-like it looked already! I was expecting more of a gummy bear appearance, but (s)he already has long legs and arms and defined-ish facial features. It was totally exciting! :)

Dadurday

     So, as I mentioned previously, I had rationed my maternity pay so that I was able to stay off with Laura for 18 months instead of 12. But, all good things must come to an end, and back in September I began looking for an 'evenings & weekends' job so that Josh would be able to watch Laura after work and we wouldn't have to send her to daycare. It took me about a month and a half, but I was finally able to land a job waitressing at a small Chinese restaurant downtown. It's nice because the dinner shifts are only three hours, so I'm not away from home that long, but boy, it can get busy on the weekends, leaving my pregnant self exhausted. I am scheduled to work the lunch shift on Saturdays as well as dinner, which means Josh is in charge of Laura for pretty much the whole day. Yesterday was the first time, and it went a little something like this:

     In the morning we took Laura to her swimming lessons, (I didn't swim because there wouldn't be enough time for me to change after), so Josh did the lesson with her. They actually did really well together, better than Laura has done so far this year.
     After swimming lessons, we rushed back to get me to work, and then Josh took Laura to the grocery store. They came home to drop off the groceries and have some lunch and then went back out to get some more errands done. After they were done, they came back to drop the car off to me, and I noticed that Laura had blood all over her hand and clothes.... not exactly what I was hoping to see on Josh's first day looking after her...

     "What happened? Why is there blood all over her?!"

     "Oh. Laura got a nosebleed... or else it's pomegranate juice."

     "What? This isn't pomegranate juice... and there is no blood on her face."

     Upon closer inspection, the blood source seemed to be coming from her finger.

     " Oh, I dunno then... I let her play with a measuring tape while we were waiting in the line-up for the car wash?"

     Awesome. "Okay... well, for future reference, you probably shouldn't let her play with those, especially unsupervised."

     Along with her bloody finger, Laura also had a runny nose. She was generally not in the best of spirits, so my boss, who had been monitoring the whole conversation told me I could go home early and just come back for the dinner shift. I happily agreed. The three hours I had been there I think I had served three tables, and there had only been a handful of take-out orders. She clearly didn't need me there.
     So, we all went home together and I got to cuddle with my sick baby. I even had time to sneak in a short nap. Bonus. After I got home from the dinner shift, I asked Josh how the rest of their day went. He told me Laura ate for about two hours straight after I left.
   
     "Oh, really? Good. What did you feed her?"

     "Sunflower seeds."

     "Oh? What else?"

     "Nothing, really. She just ate about a cup of sunflower seeds."

     "A cup?! Oh boy, that will make for some interesting poo tomorrow (and it did). Didn't you feed her any real dinner? Like meat or vegetables?"

     "No... she was eating the sunflower seeds and just kept asking for more."

  
     Oooookay, then. :S







     So, Daddy's first Saturday was a bit of an adventure, but I'm sure he'll get the hang of it. He actually did a pretty good job holding down the fort on his own. The groceries were bought, floor got swept, and I think he even made time to scrub the toilet. <3


    

Mommy Guilt

    When I became a mom, I was unaware of the guilt that would plague me for what I can only assume will be the rest of my life. Am I choosing the right parenting tactics? Do I make enough effort to foster Laura's interests? Is being a Stay At Home Mom really the best for Laura, or am I doing it for the wrong reasons? It is amazing all of the little things you can over-analyze about and worry over when you put your mind to it.
   
     And then I got pregnant. And then I found out there is a whole new level of Mommy Guilt.
    
     My sister and I are 4.5 years apart, and I found that age difference to be very hard. Now, mind you, some people have siblings that far apart (and farther) and still have fabulous relationships, but my sister and I were not really what you would call "friends" when we were little. We fought a lot, and I picked on her. That is not what I wanted for my family. Perhaps I am making assumptions under false pretenses here, as I'm sure factors affecting siblings' abilities to get along vary far more than the age gap between them, but I figured having our children closer together might help at least little. So, really, I did have Laura in mind when planning the whole thing.
     However, one of the first problems we've encountered is that I am still nursing Laura a few times a day, and as soon as I found out I was pregnant, I noticed her getting frustrated with the whole process. She seemed impatient and insatiable, constantly asking to nurse. This led me to believe that my milk supply had taken a hit, which is not uncommon. So I did some research to see what I could do to help. What I turned up with was.... nothing. Pregnancy Rules are very restrictive, so even the herbal remedies commonly suggested to help increase milk production in lactating mothers are prohibited. The only thing my doctor recommended was letting her nurse more to biologically stimulate my body. But she is 19 months old. I don't want to nurse her the 100 times a day she asks for it anymore. So, we kind of just struggled on with it, doing the best we could and trying to find a balance we were both happy with.
     Enter Morning Sickness.
     At about 5 - 5.5 weeks, Morning Sickness reared its ugly head. Food became less and less appetizing, and accordingly, I began to eat less and less. This pregnancy has been eerily similar to my pregnancy with Laura so far, so much that I think I might be having her twin. I have had pretty much the same food aversions, same Morning-Sickness-at-dinner-time, and generally have felt the same level of nausea (although Josh remembers it differently). I lost 10 pounds in the first trimester with Laura, and so far I have lost 4 pounds at 8 weeks. I was whining to my mom yesterday about how crappy I was feeling, and we were also discussing my guilt, and she pointed out that the hit my milk supply has taken is probably more so due to my newfound crappy eating habits than the pregnancy. And I think she was right. After the first little dip, things seemed to be okay again for a few weeks, but then I hadn't been eating much/ well, and I noticed Laura had become re-frustrated. So, starting today, I vowed that I would at least try to eat a reasonable amount of food, if not only so I could maintain enough milk to keep my little nursling happy. She didn't ask for any of this, and I don't find it fair to her that she is suffering because of it.
     Guilt Trip Number Two consists of my energy level. It's pretty low. I need naps + Laura thinking she doesn't need naps = incompatible. One day early on I could not physically stay awake anymore, and she was refusing to go to sleep, so my patience ran out and I just had to let her cry for the duration of my nap - about half an hour. :( The worst part is, I have been having an awful time sleeping at night, which is when Laura actually sleeps, and I should be too. I will wake up and not be able to get back to sleep for an hour. Sometimes multiple times a night. That makes for a tired mommy in the morning who does not want to play, but would rather lounge lazily on the couch, while letting Laura watch movies. Uggghhh. Just typing that sentence has sent a new wave of guilt awash over me. The other morning I actually fell asleep on the couch and Laura went upstairs and got into something and cut her finger (it wasn't bleeding, so not too bad, but obviously could have been much worse). So, not only am I being a bad, unstimulating, and unsupervising mommy, I am also allowing her to watch mind-numbing television for far too much of the day. But it's so easy - she likes it, and I get to rest... it seems like a good compromise, except it's not. Because of the guilt. And the brain damage I am probably doing to her. And it's not even like she is watching shows like Sesame Street that I can pass off as 'educational', no, recently she has somehow become completely and utterly infatuated with Winnie the Pooh. We have watched it so many times that Daddy finally put a ban on us using Youtube to watch it anymore on account of our bandwidth and downloaded us a copy to my hard drive. 
     So there's that.
     And then there is also the uncleanliness of my house, and the general lack of chore-doing on my part. This guilt item is not specifically pertaining to Laura, but the members of my household in general. When Josh and I were married we divided up the chores between us. For the last few weeks, I have been sorely lacking on my half, which means he has had to compensate. He has fed Laura her (pureed and therefore barf-worthy) dinner every day for the last three weeks. He has had to fend for himself for dinner for most of those nights, too, and Josh doesn't cook. His culinary skills end at turning on the oven and throwing in some frozen chicken fingers and fries. So neither of us have been eating particularly well for a while now. And the rest of the cleaning just hasn't been getting done: there is a fearsome ring in our bathtub, the toilet could use a good scrub, and a large mountain of laundry has accumulated and needs to be put away (at least it's clean), to mention a few. If anyone knows of a free maid, please send them on over.
     So, on top of all that, I feel a small amount of guilt over being less excited about this pregnancy than I was with the first two pregnancies. I mean, it was well-planned and I was completely and utterly ecstatic about it for the first few days after I found out, but I am having a hard time maintaining my excitement level through all of our toils. And most days I don't even remember that there is a kidney bean-sized parasite growing inside of me causing all of this. Then I feel bad, because I'm pretty sure I thought about Laura every day I was pregnant with her.
     The good news is that this trimester won't last forever. Eventually food will resume its appeal, eventually sleep will (hopefully) stop escaping me at night and stop being necessary through the day, eventually I will have enough energy to clean my house again (if it hasn't imploded on itself by then), and eventually this little kidney bean will be big enough to kick me every day and remind me to send love its way <3.

Happy Hallowe'en!

     Tonight we took Laura Trick or Treating for the first time. Last year we dressed her up, but since she couldn't really eat candy, we decided to forego touring for treats.

She was Baby Peach from Mario Kart

 

    We try to choose her costume based on her interests; last year she loved watching us play Mario Kart, this year she is really into Sesame Street. So we went with the Sesame Street theme and carved Elmo, Big Bird and Kermit pumpkins at the neighbours' yesterday. Since Josh is the Pumpkin Master Template Designer, he decided they all needed fangs to be more Hallowe'eny. 

 

     Laura dressed up as Super Grover, and Josh went as Count Von Count to take her around. 

     Laura did surprisingly well going house to house considering how much she had us believing she hated wearing her costume. I think the fact that people were handing her fistfuls of candy helped. ;)

The caped Sesame Street Characters

     Laura was also very excited about the fact that, "Moon!! Up!!!"

 

     We trick or treated for about an hour, then came home to hand out candy while watching 'It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown'. Laura helped, too. And ate way too much candy of her own haul.

Damn You, Naptime...

... and your routine being so effective on me instead of the intended victim!

     Naptime routine at our house includes lunch, followed by perhaps a little playing depending on the time, then change diaper, turn off lights, soothing lullabies on, and nursing to sleep. Nearly every day this routine suckers me into the sleepy land that is afternoon naps, but not always Laura.
     Today, for instance, Laura didn't wake up for the day until 9:30. She missed her nap yesterday because we were out and about, so I guess she was extra tired. I debated about waking her up this morning so I would have a fighting chance of her having a nap today, but, I just cannot quite bring myself to wake a sleeping baby. So, at the beginning of the day I braced myself for a long one.

Laura's first night in her 'big girl bed'.
She slept on the floor by the door until 6am
when Daddy put her back in bed...

      Nevertheless, I wasn't going down without a fight. Around 2:00 (an hour later than usual) I tried the naptime routine, only to have it backfire and work very effectively on me. We have had the crib side off for two days now, and have a bed rail up instead, which obviously allows Laura to get in and out of bed as she pleases. Not conducive to napping. So, I curled up on the nursery floor with a pillow and blanket and closed my eyes, naively hoping that somehow she would climb into bed and follow suit. She didn't. I kept half an eye on her as she puttered around the nursery pulling clothing and pajamas from her dresser and mixing them in with the dirty clothing from her laundry hamper. At some point I must have drifted off, as I awoke to a foot in my eye in the process of my head being straddled, "BOUN[CE] BOUN[CE]!!" ... sigh.
     So, after about 40 minutes I gave up and we went downstairs to watch a movie instead. You win some, you lose some, I guess.