Merry F*ing Christmas

     I used to love Christmas. But now that I am a mom, I have finally found the true meaning... Christmas = stress. Three of the last four Decembers I have been pregnant, and for some reason, I have found it hard to really get into the Christmas spirit. Maybe it is my body telling me to take it easy... I should probably take the hint.
     When I first spent Christmas at Josh's house, his family, his mom in particular, spent the whole holiday season going around saying, "Merry F*ing Christmas". I thought that was very un-Christmasy of her at the time, but now I get it. Baking. Shopping. Wrapping. Visiting. Packing. Travelling. CLEANING. It all boils down to one thing: more stress for Mom. It's too much. I just barely keep our regular lives under control, let alone have time for all of these extra other things expected of me during the holidays. Josh doesn't seem to get it. He will help out if I specifically ask him to do a certain task, but it does not cross his mind to ask me if I need any extra help when he sees me getting super stressed out like this. And that only perpetuates the issue.
    Last night I was up working on last minute Christmas things (of which there are a still a plethora), and Josh informs me that I am making it too hard for myself, "You are making handmade wrapping paper out of fabric - that is more effort than you need to put in." While this may be true, I still needed some way to wrap these oddly-shaped, non-boxed presents. And so I was making fabric present bags. He suggested just wrapping them crappily in paper and blaming it on him. Helpful.
     He ended up staying up later than me, which he does almost every Friday, because he was 'too excited to sleep', (but not for Christmas, no,) because he got his first song on an internet radio show. Normally I would try harder to join him in his excitement, but right now stress and exhaustion have set up camp in all corners of my body and brain. Now, I don't mind him staying up later, as he needs this time for himself to unwind. But sometimes it gets out of hand and he ends up staying up WAY too late, rendering himself unfunctional the next day. And I certainly can't have that. Not today. I still have approximately a million things to do, and at the very least he is going to have to be awake to watch Laura. So, when I woke up at 5:30 this morning, and he still hadn't come to bed, I felt my blood pressure starting to rise. I was not going to be able to go back to sleep until I knew if he had gone to bed. I poke my head into the guest room. Nope, not in there. I poke my head down the stairs. Ahhh, he is on the couch. So he does know what's good for him after all. I guess he heard me puddling around upstairs, so he came up then. He said he went to bed at 2am, but didn't want to wake me up so he slept on the couch. Good. Except last night I really wanted to have a nice little Christmas Eve Eve of our own since we are going to be away and/or have guests for the best part of the next week = not much time for just us. But I guess that wasn't going to happen.
   Anyway, I can't think of a very good way to wrap up this post, and I really can't legitimize any more time spent venting when I still have so many other things to do. I guess next year I will just need to start earlier.
Merry Christmas, everyone! :S

Kids Are Weird

     One thing I can say about Laura is that she is a pro at independent play. When she was a baby I would try to play with her, but her attention span was so short for things that I would do with her, I soon grew bored of sitting on the floor trying to entice her while she was happily playing her own way.
     She doesn't have nearly as many toys as most other kids her age we know, but it's probably a good thing, because most of the toys she does have sit in the playroom, for the most part, untouched. Her favourite things to play with are every day items that you would never conceive of as being able to provide fun for days in and days out.
     I received a stocking present one year that included a small velcro make-up bag containing two tubes of face cream. It lived in the drawer in our bathroom for some time until Laura was able to get around and follow me in there. Her favourite thing to do while I use the washroom is to open and close the drawer, and sort through the various items in there. Taking out random toothbrushes and hair clips... until one day she found the prized make-up bag. This bag has provided her with hours days of fun. She carries it around the house from room to room taking the tubes out and putting them back in. Doing up the velcro, undoing the velcro. Taking the tubes out, putting them in her mouth, putting the tubes back in the bag. All around the house. How this could possibly be fun is really beyond me. But whatever floats your boat, I guess.
     And then one day not too long ago she discovered the joy of pens. But not for drawing or colouring with. No. For taking the lid off, and putting it back on. So there was another week of fun right there.
     Today, I was trying to clear off my counter (which lately has seemed to accumulate way more things than usual) and there was a small bucket with those plastic, reusable ice cubes that I needed to get rid of. I was just going to take it to Goodwill or throw it out, but Laura saw it and demanded to look at it. (I think she thought they were candy to begin with). Well. She has literally not put that bucket down all day. Taking the ice cubes in and out, taking off and replacing the lid. Over and over. We even went to the Early Years Centre this morning for a dancing/ movement program, and it came with us. Laura did not participate in the program, just continued to take the ice cubes in and out. So by this afternoon, I was starting to feel a little guilty about not providing her with some better entertainment/ activities/ time with Mommy. I started looking through my bookmarked websites for fun toddler activities we could do together. I decided to make a sensory bag like this. I whipped one up quickly (using handsoap instead of toothpaste because we don't have 3 extra tubes lying around), and.... she proceeded to take no interest in it. Ice cubes in. Ice cubes out. Share with dog. Take back from dog. Ice cubes back in bucket.
     Now don't get me wrong, she does like to play with 'real' toys some of the time - mostly dolls and stuffed animals, and she pretends with them to some extent. She also really enjoys reading books together, which is one of the only activities I can really engage in with her. Part of me is a little sad, though, because I see all of these totally fun blogs of parents crafting with their children, and I get so excited because I LOVE crafts and I want to try them with Laura... but so far she really doesn't seem to be into creating. She is much more of an explore-her-world-and-experiment type kid. Science brain, I guess.

Gingerbread Weekend

     Since Josh and I were married, we have made a tradition of making an original gingerbread house from scratch each year.

     Our first Christmas together we made a tropical getaway home (complete with palm tree) in anticipation of our upcoming trip to Australia:

(the outhouse was Josh's contribution. They are not actually commonplace in Australia)

    

    The year we came back from Australia we attempted a gingerbread castle. Unfortunately, due to unforseen circumstances, this was as finished as it got:

 

     The next year, we had just moved into our own very first home, so we decided to make a scale model replica: 

Josh felt the need to make it 'realistic' and add dog poop to the yard.

We even did the interior, too! :)

     Then, last year, we made a gingerbread treehouse:

including happy children creepy, drunken old men playing underneath (again, Josh)

     This year we wanted to do something relatively uncomplicated so Laura could help. We ended up doing 'Santa Visits the Great Pyramid':

Watch out for the Santa-eating cobra!

     We didn't actually end up letting Laura help with the pyramid, but she did help decorate cookies:

And she did a good job, too! <3

I'm Back!

Goodbye, first trimester, you will not be missed!

     This past week I was finally able to muster the energy and motivation to resume cleaning my house. Prior to this I had been doing the very minimum required to keep my family alive: coming up with some semblence of food to sustain us (which actually Josh did a lot of the time) and providing clean clothes only when every other item had been used thoroughly. You know, that kind of stuff.
     So this week has been a lot of catching up chores, and the list of things I would like to get done is still quite long. I'm still struggling with insomnia a little bit, but most of the time it is okay. Things are starting to look up - I even cooked some real meals this week! No more Kraft Dinner and cereal. I have generally started feeling better (but not great), and eating is still kind of touch and go. For a while there the only things I could stomach were apple juice and Raisin Bran. I think I have lost a total of 10 - 11 pounds (:S). Hopefully that trend will soon change. Laura has been happy about all the apple juice that has been around though, and now asks for "SHUICE! SHUICE!" on a daily basis. I don't think she is going to be too happy when I can start living without it again and it is no longer available. Also, I think I have felt some movement a couple of times, but nothing definite to report. Soon, though, I'm sure! I'm definitely feeling the belly, though! Here is a progression of belly shots with respectively-sized edible items for comparison of how big the baby is:

5 WEEKS

7 WEEKS

9 WEEKS

 

11 WEEKS

13 WEEKS

Rant-a Claus

     Call me a Grinch, but why do people lie to kids about the existence of Santa Claus?

     I've never understood why parents feel compelled to lie about some magical fat man who completes the seemingly impossible feat of delivering presents to every home in the world on Christmas Eve. I mean, I guess it creates a 'magical moment' for the kids on Christmas morning... but I think that moment could still be created in other, less deceitful ways. Plus, it is uber-disappointing when you finally figure out that your parents have been lying to you about said magical man for the last 6 years. Or, at least, it was for me.
     One Christmas Eve I discovered presents marked 'from Santa' in the basement in the wrapping pile. I was not a snooper - I'm not sure what I was even doing down there - but my 6-year-old-self's logic kicked in and I wondered how those presents could be there from Santa already when Santa isn't supposed to come until after I was in bed... That, and I had older cousins, who I am pretty sure ruined it for me.

      I also feel that the whole Santa business takes away from what Christmas should really be about. Kids generally have a one-track mind and it becomes all-consuming for them to be on their best behaviour to make the 'nice' list in order to get the material gifts that they want. Don't get me wrong, I'm all for best behaviour, but I would rather have the motivation be something more intrinsic and less superficial. The problem is, with our society, you can't get away from Santa. I don't want my children to think that they are being punished or skipped over because Santa doesn't leave presents at our house, but at the same time, I am definitely not going to push the issue. Once our kids are old enough to understand Santa and start asking about him, he might leave one or two gifts for them, but until then, I don't think it's necessary.

     I have read in many parenting books that traditions are very important to children - they give them a sense of belonging and what to expect. I, too, am big on tradition, and so want to create special traditions for my family that honour what we value. These are what create those ever-cherished magical moments, not a fat man in a red suit.
Our traditions include:

• painting ceramic Christmas ornaments each year so our children will have their own collection
• including a year-in-review letter with our Christmas cards
• putting up the Christmas tree/decorations the first weekend in December
• making a gingerbread house/ structure (from scratch) the second weekend in December
• Christmas Movie Advent
• New pajamas for Christmas Eve
• Christmas morning at Grandma's
• Taking down the tree New Year's Day

I'm sure there are more that I have forgotten, or that will evolve as time goes on, but it is important to me to keep them the same from year to year so they will become special memories for our children forever.
Merry Christmas!

Christmas is Coming!

     This weekend was full of fun-filled family/ Christmas activities. As usual, we took Laura to her swimming lessons Saturday morning, and she did better than she usually does when I am in the pool, which was nice.

Afterwards, we went and picked up her Christmas ornament she painted last week... it's very 'abstract', we'll say, but turned out pretty well, I think, considering it was painted by a one-year-old. :)

     After swimming we went to the bank for some financial advice, for which Laura was reasonably well-behaved, other than trying to make off with the paper from the lady's printer. Then we came home and had a quick bite and some naps. After I woke up, I made Laura a hat to go with her winter coat, and then we trekked off to the Santa Claus parade in town. I was only able to stay for about the first 20 minutes because I had to go to work, and I wasn't sure if Laura would be into it or not, but when Josh tried to bring her into the restaurant half way through the parade she demanded to be taken back out. So I guess she liked it. She was a little apprehensive of the loudness that was the emergency service vehicles, but felt compelled to wave to them nonetheless (below). Based on the amount of times she mentioned "Neigh!! Neigh!! Boon! Boons!", I'd say it is safe to say her favourite parts were the horses from the riding club, and the balloon store's float.

     Josh came into the restaurant for dinner after the parade (along with EVERYONE else who was watching it), and though the service was slow, Laura was very patient and did really well on her date out with Daddy. :)
     This morning we got a start on Christmas shopping and went for groceries and I was actually able to enjoy our family trip to the grocery store again without feeling the need to vomit. After, we went and picked out some Christmas movies to rent for the week, and came home for lunch. After naptime Josh and I discussed the possibility of going to see the new Muppet movie with Laura. She is only one and a half, but has a reasonably long attention span for movies she is interested in, and she is definitely interested in the Muppets, so we thought we would give it a go. Plus it was good way to put off vacuuming. She did about as well as I expected her to; she sat through about half the show contentedly eating Skittles, and then decided that traversing the giant set of stairs would be more entertaining for the second half of the movie. It was fine - there weren't that many people there, and she wasn't being loud, and most of the other patrons had kids with them. When the movie was over (it was quite cute, by the way, if you're wondering), we came home and Skyped Grandma and Grandpa so Laura could tell them about her weekend. She told them all about the "[Muppet] Show! Show!" and the "Neighs! Nine Neighs!" and the "Boons!!" and then proceeded to run around the living room on her Skittle high.
     All in all a good weekend. <3

Laura These Days

     I feel like Laura deserves a post all to herself just for an update on what she has been up to:

     She has been ever increasing her vocabulary, and although she seems to possibly be slightly behind her same-age peers, she still manages to impress us and make us laugh on a daily basis. She repeats words back that we say (or tries to, at least), and is always looking to use them in context. The other night (after our ultrasound) we were out for dinner, and I guess she was quite hungry. We had bread on the table, but I didn't want her to fill up on that, so we only gave her one piece. Next thing I know, she is reaching out for it saying, "Peesh! Peesh!!" (that is toddlerese for 'please'). It was soo cute, I couldn't stand it. She had never used 'please' in context before without being prompted! Of course I had to give in. <3 We have been working on using it in context this week, but mostly we still get "I WA DAT" ('I want that').
She also understands the idea of one and more than one, which she refers to as 'TWO!', regardless of how many there actually are. Either she is very excited about the concept of two, or she likes to make bad mathematician factorial jokes on a daily basis.

     The big girl bed... still not going so well. She sleeps on the floor behind her door every night. Which is fine, I guess. :S Her bed is now used for stuffed animal storage and gymnastics during the day. And, if it's possible, she sleeps even more lightly now than she did before, so any tiny creak in the floor wakes her up. It has made for some long nights. Thankfully if/ when she wakes up at night now, I can go in and tell her that, "Mommy is tired, and it is the middle of the night, so you need to go to sleep right now, because Mommy is going back to bed." She also gets a lot of, "Mommy is going for a nap now. You can have a nap, too, or stay in your room and play quietly." Both of which seem to work reasonably well. :) We are planning on moving her to her new room after Christmas. It will probably be a long and painful transition if the transition to her 'big girl bed' has been any indication, so we want to give her lots of time.

     Since I have been working, Laura has started eating so much better! She has hardly been on any purees, and has even started eating meat with a fork. She has also been eating much MORE food, and growing like a weed, accordingly. It's actually a huge relief to see her take real interest in making sure she gets enough. She is still nursing about 3-ish times a day (when she wakes up, before nap, and after nap), give or take depending on the day. I am starting to get the feeling that people are beginning to frown upon this, but it is still working for her and for me, so we will continue. And not that I need to defend myself, but even the WHO recommends breastfeeding until age two.

     Laura is enrolled in swimming lessons again for the semester, and as long as Mom isn't in the pool, she continues to enjoy them. If I am there, she whines and clings to me and doesn't participate in any of the activites even though she can do all the required skills. We did have to buy her a wetsuit, though, so she would be warm enough, and she still shivers by the end of the lesson. This kid needs some body fat!
She is also heavily into animal books and has developed a strong fascination with the moon. She likes to watch 'Mouch!' (Mickey Mouse), Pooh, and 'Memmo' (Elmo/ Sesame Street) and refers to The Count as 'Nine' because of this song on one of her DVDs. Very cute.

     We are starting to think about potty training, but so far Laura hasn't shown a whole lot of interest. Sometimes we can convince her to do a #2 on the toilet if we catch her quickly enough in the beginning stages, but we've definitely got a long way to go still. I am pretty sure she could do it, but she has to be motivated to want to, and so far she doesn't seem to be. I am in no rush, as we don't have to buy diapers, and I am concerned about it interfering with our trip in February. Potty training accidents are not something I particularly want to deal with while on vacation, so I might just wait until we get back. Having said that, she will be getting some big girl undies for Christmas. :)

     Also, I taught her to do this tonight:

Charming, I know :)